Experience has taught us that interactions with others are successful when both are equally committed to the result. We find that true in both our personal relationships and our business dealings. The question is: How do we gauge commitment before engaging with one another?
Commitment
Before we can gauge commitment, we need to be clear about what we mean by commitment. To me, commitment is a combination of clarity and intent.
Clarity
All parties must be clear, and specific, about what the result will look like. There must also be clarity about what each party is willing, and unwilling, to do to effect the result.
Intent
The parties must also intend to do what they’re committing to do. There is no “try, hope, or could” language permitted because these words do not indicate intent. Intent is a conscious decision to do what’s required, within ethical boundaries, to produce the desired result.
Gauging commitment
Language is easy, action is hard. When a person’s language indicates commitment, but they fail to act in accordance withs their words, intent does not exist. In these situations, what the person is telling you is that while they desire the outcome, they don’t desire it enough to take action.
We see this play out in a variety of situations including:
- Prospective customers who can’t make a decision.
- Companies that establish policies without regard to their policy’s impact on customers.
- Employees who consistently fail to meet expectations.
- Employers take advantage of committed workers.
- Vendors who consistently fail to deliver on time at the expected level of quality.
- Customers who continually demand more, but are unwilling to pay more.
- Life partners who skirt difficult conversations.
- Friends who say that they’re there for us, but aren’t when the going gets tough.
The key to gauging commitment lies in congruency between words and actions. If congruency doesn’t exist, neither does commitment. When faced with this situation, walk away. You’ll save all parties involved from a failed experience.
If congruency exists, go for it. You have all the elements of success that you need. Results are virtually assured when all parties are committed as evidenced by both their language and their behaviors.
Takeaway
Before engaging with others, look for congruency between their language and their actions. If it exists, go for it. If it doesn’t exist, walk away…save yourself heartache and disappointment.
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Resources
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