Asking For Help

Why do many of us find asking for help so uncomfortable?

Background

The topic of asking for help surfaced two days in a row..

Day one, I was on a panel when one of the panelists urged the business-owner audience to ask for help. She made it a point that none of us accomplishes anything on our own. She said: “We have always gotten help, in some form, from others.”

That help could have come in the form of an insight gained from another, encouragement in our dark hours or actual assistance in achieving what we set out to do.

Day two, I was on a zoom conference to help tech students nearing graduation improve their interview skills. During the session the topic of asking for help surfaced.

Before I share with you my message to them, let’s explore why we resist asking for help.

Why we resist

There are a plethora of reasons why we don’t ask for help. Here a few of the more common reasons:

• We don’t want to impose on others’ good natures.
• We’re afraid of looking stupid.
• We think we should be able to figure it out on our own.
• We think that asking for help is a sign of weakness.

These are stories we tell ourselves; they are not reality.

Reality

As the panelist stated: “The most successful people are happy to help.” Indeed, the more successful a person is, the more likely they are to possess an abundance mentality that enables them to find joy is helping others share in the abundance they experience.

In my discussion with the students, I echoed these thoughts when I said to them: “When we fail to ask for help we deprive others’ of the joy of helping. Recall how you feel when you are able to help others; remember how good you felt about yourself when you helped them. That feeling is what you’re depriving others of when you fail to ask for help.”

Takeaway

When you find yourself hesitating to ask for help, pause a moment to realize that if you fail to ask, you’re depriving others of the opportunity to feel valued and valuable. It’ll make asking for help a lot easier. It’ll also help you achieve your goals a lot more quickly.

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Resources

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